Married

Inside The Shell

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January 10th, 2025

Trust is something
I don’t know how to give
Because I moved on
But I still can’t forgive
The person who should’ve been there
Left me alone and broken
Pushed me into a shell of myself
Until I was no longer outspoken
Crippled me into a “tolerable” version
Where I was living a lie
And after all of these years
I still find it hard to cry
I should have been happy
Because I was married
But they left me with these feelings
That I can’t keep buried
How can I trust someone new
When my spouse broke my hope
I longed for a connection
They didn’t want to know
When I needed them most
They were not there
I reached out for help
And they didn’t even care
I was over being neglected
I was their last priority
Now how am I supposed to trust
That anyone can show up for me
After three years I’m still healing
Because I carry this burden
From the decade that I spent
Trying to love an Urban

Inheritance

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December 3rd, 2024

Life was never as hard for me
As when I thought it was easy
Because I look at trauma it caused
And it still makes me feel uneasy
You had the money to pay the bills
But I paid with my childhood
Cleaning up your vodka bottles
And wishing things were good
When I grew up I got married
And the cycle then repeated
I found the hidden vodka bottles
And feared I’d been defeated
But I broke free from you
So I broke free from him
Even when it was uncomfortable
I pushed myself out on a limb
Because love is not an apology
For doing the same things again
So I had to break the pattern
And move on from where I’ve been
Now I do dry January every year
Knowing I could be just a drink away
From becoming just like you or him
And I’ll always choose a different way
You raised me to think this was normal
So I don’t know if I can ever forgive you
But I hope I found the end to the story
That I never planned to continue

Band Tee

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December 20th, 2018

I was young when I first met you
You caught my eye and I thought “you’re cute”
You looked at me and you felt it too
I took a leap with no parachute

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

You pick me up in your silver car
Take me away, I don’t care how far
Serenade me with your guitar
I’ll write you songs for my repertoire

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

In your arms you’re my sanctuary
You keep me safe like it’s necessary
And keep me warm when it’s January
I’m so thankful it’s you I married

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

Note: This song is meant to be pop-country. I don’t usually write ‘happy’ things, and I scarcely write songs. However, I enjoyed how this turned out.