Solitude

October 12th, 2023

I manage my expectations by expecting the worst
Then I tackle my problems by diving head first
And I keep a shoe ready in hand
So the other won’t drop before the moment I planned
I’ve lived my life in survival mode
Meticulously analyzed every crossroad
And I will freeze before I fight or flight
So I can justify why I am right
So I built my walls without a door
There’s no getting in without a war
I’m stuck in a realm of constant distrust
Because I’ve lost my mind in love and lust
I’ve been hurt time and time again
I live my life playing pretend
I need people but let them go
I’d rather suffer than let it show

A Mere Reflection

November 10th, 2009

I experienced things
That you didn’t know
I got hurt
But it didn’t show
I heard things
You didn’t hear
I kept close to me
Things only I would fear
It only hurt me
I brought it too near
But you can’t feel the pain
In the reflection of the mirror

Porcelain Prison

September 20th, 2009

You have to face it
Because it’s real
What you think doesn’t matter
They don’t care how you feel
They’re all going to judge you
But they’ll never know
What it’s like to be you
Because none of it shows
And even if it did
They’ll never care
And you’ll have to move on
Because they won’t always be there
And I know that it hurts
And that you’ll want to cry
But you have to stay strong
Even when you want to die
Because as cold as it is
And as weak as you are
You’ll move right through it
Because you’re going to go far