Goodbye (Sorry Means Nothing)

August 2004

It’s hard for me to say
What’s becoming of this day
Never knowing what to do
I always end up running back to you

[Chorus:]
Hey, I was dreaming of you
Late last night (oh)
I was in love with you
But now that feeling’s gone
Never knowing what to say
It’s like you ditched me every day
My heart is beating uncontrollably
I’m going to cry
It’s time to say goodbye
To all of my feelings that have been unleashed
Lock them in a cage, get out of this stupid stage
All of this happened because you said goodbye

Maybe I could at least say sorry
But the pain you put me through isn’t over
I’m always crying over this but it happened months ago
It’s hard to forget all your twisted lies

I wish I could lock them up in a cage
Why am I stuck in this stupid stage
Water dripping from my eyes so much like a faucet
My dreams are missing in action

[Chorus:]
Hey, I was dreaming of you
Late last night (oh)
I was in love with you
But now that feeling’s gone
Never knowing what to say
It’s like you ditched me every day
My heart is beating uncontrollably
I’m going to cry
It’s time to say goodbye
To all of my feelings that have been unleashed
Lock them in a cage, get out of this stupid stage
All of this happened because you said goodbye

Maybe you could have said sorry
And maybe I would have forgave you
But that’s all for now
Never say sorry
It means nothing
Goodbye

Goodbye
Goodbye
Sorry means nothing
Goodbye

My heart is beating really fast
My hands are getting sweaty
Will this moment ever last
Holding on is getting hard
Why is life like this

[Chorus:]
Hey, I was dreaming of you
Late last night (oh)
I was in love with you
But now that feeling’s gone
Never knowing what to say
It’s like you ditched me every day
My heart is beating uncontrollably
I’m going to cry
It’s time to say goodbye
To all of my feelings that have been unleashed
Lock them in a cage, get out of this stupid stage
All of this happened because you said goodbye

Note: I found some older writing, mostly songs, on my computer. I will be posting these the remainder of this month – feel free to laugh at my teenage angst!

2004 (5)

The Real Me

November 4th, 2018

Everyday I wake up and look in the mirror
I smile and say I’m fine
But I know that’s not the truth
When I’m living a life that’s not mine
Some people know my story
Some say they’re thankful to meet someone like them
But when they see the real me
They walk away because they can’t comprehend
That I actually have a disease
My depression is not a trend
My anxiety is crippling
And I just needed a friend
But they take the first out that they get
Because friends come and go
And I can’t get too close
To someone who doesn’t know
Because I drop my walls
To those who don’t say goodbye
It’s hard to stop myself
When I don’t have to live my lie
But people don’t like the real me
They want the version I don’t know
So I will keep my distance
With a smile and a show

Note: I read a new poem this week. If you can’t tell, I was unpracticed and extremely nervous. However, this is the real me.

When I Say Goodbye

September 27th, 2018

Everyone says hello
When I’ve already said goodbye
You still haven’t left
And I don’t know why
They said to give it time
But I can’t give anymore
My heart is still broken
From this open sore
You didn’t want to talk
I guess I should have known
I put everyone’s priorities
Before I place my own
I gave everything
I have nothing else
So when I say goodbye
I do this for myself