Thoughts

Mirage

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August 30th, 2009

Last night you held my hand, just like a few weeks ago when we kissed, and those were all dreams, but nothing feels as real as this. I’m lost in this state of mind, and I can’t figure out who you are, and in the process of figuring myself out too, I’m not getting very far. You did this to me unintended I beg, I didn’t expect anything out of words, but here I am with you running through my mind, and you haven’t seemed to step out yet. I never expected to see you like this, and I never expected to see myself acting the way I am, but here I am looking at myself in the mirror, appearance untouched, but looking deeper shows that nothing’s what it used to be. I’m at a loss of words on the fact we’ve been at a loss for words our self, and our conversation has ended. Waiting to talk to you has been on my mind for too long now, and every time my phone goes off my smile fades because your name isn’t there anymore. If it weren’t for my curiosity I would have never had to hear you say you’re sorry, and you weren’t, but it made me smile anyway. If you’re just a mirage it’d be nice if you could let me know now, because I don’t want to get too close to someone who will only disappear in the end.

(Originally Posted Here)

Flying By

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August 25th, 2009

You took me by surprise
I can barely hide this with a lie
And once I speak to you
Maybe I will know what to do

And I can’t hide the fact
My thoughts just aren’t exact
And realistically I don’t know you at all
So why did I let myself fall

[Chorus:]
Spinning in circles as I’m waiting for you
I just needed somebody to turn to
Who are you cause I can’t deny
When we talk time keeps flying by

My identity’s gone just from talking to you
Nothing seems to be what I’m used to
I feel all giggly like a kid
I don’t even know what you did

[Chorus:]
Spinning in circles as I’m waiting for you
I just needed somebody to turn to
Who are you cause I can’t deny
When we talk time keeps flying by

You found something I lost inside myself
And I wouldn’t want to put up with anybody else
Maybe things aren’t so strange
Life keeps giving me chances to change

[Chorus:]
Spinning in circles as I’m waiting for you
I just needed somebody to turn to
Who are you cause I can’t deny
When we talk time keeps flying by

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DNA

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August 21st, 2009

I want to speak up, but even then I fear no one will hear me still. Even if they hear me, that doesn’t mean that they’re actually even listening. You find yourself writing about your friends, but they’re too annoyed at the fact you’re always writing new things, to even bother reading them anymore. Putting effort and affection into something you think is art, and finding the response wasn’t what you wanted sometimes hurts a lot more than you thought it would. No response, or interrogation. The people who actually care don’t read it in the way it’s supposed to be artistically, and want to know what’s behind it. Writing is personal, and sometimes it takes a lot of courage for me to post it. No one sees that; no one understands. No one gets what crossed my mind when I tried to form those phrases; when I tried to create something that replaces the need for pages and pages of smeared ink diary entries. Simple and complex, they link together, their DNA forms all I need to say that I love writing, but sometimes words are not enough to keep me breathing.

(Originally Posted Here)