October 6th, 2009
I find myself hiding,
in corners of my mind,
I was raised like this,
my walls can’t be broken down.
I’ve been placed here,
built the bricks up high,
and I’m scared to climb over,
because they’re too wobbly.
There’s no foundation,
they’re trying to break down,
and I find myself scared,
even if it’s what I want.
I need to let them in,
I lead them to the door,
just a step more,
then I lock myself in.
May 22nd, 2023
I’m trying not to love you
As you’re telling me I’m worth it
And I’m holding in all my tears
Because everything feels perfect
Telling me this is the bare minimum
When it’s more than I’ve ever received
Feeling like a fairy tale
After how often I’ve been deceived
But I’m scared to get attached
To find out this is only a fantasy
And my past that left me guarded
Is scared that this could be a reality
It’s only been a month
But we talk everyday
And while you’re on the road
I hope you drive my way
Because I can’t wait to feel
My hand inside of yours
Tangled in your arms
A life behind closed doors
I want to spend all day talking in bed
I want your arms to cover me like a blanket
I want you to teach me to love myself
But I haven’t even met you yet
December 20th, 2022
Scared to make myself vulnerable
Knowing how much I could have liked you
Trying not to ruin a good thing
Because there is no re-do
Keeping my walls up
When you’re the thing that scares me
Feeling safe with you
But getting hurt again is terrifying
Not sure where this was going
But every story has an end
So is this ours
Or will we still be friends?
Doll Poetry 