Drown

April 14th, 2025

This is cliche but it didn’t kill me
I’m just done with this silence
I’m over your inconsistency
Knowing I’ll never find reliance
As the feelings come in waves
I accept that I am broken
And my words won’t change anything
So I leave them unspoken
No one can fix me except myself
But that’s a job that I keep failing
Because I gave you power over me
And then you kept bailing
Maybe it’s the loneliness
That’s making me feel haunted
I just wish it wasn’t you
Who made me feel unwanted
Even though I want to tell you this 
It’s easier to not bring it up again
Because I never asked for anything
And you couldn’t even be a friend
It didn’t even need to be a horizon
You could’ve brought me anything
Now this is the third year in a row
Where you won’t know me in spring
You decided to let me drown
But I know what people say
That it needs to rain in April
To enjoy the flowers in May

Dating Chronicles

December 18th, 2023

I think about the past more than now and then
Too many nights drowning my pain in the arms of other men
Supplements are not supplementing what’s not there
So I’m buckling at my knees and proceeding nowhere
I’ve always ended things before someone else got the chance
I guess this is my circumstance
When they don’t value me in my presence
They can mourn me in my absence
When I said I don’t want this who was I trying to fool
I only said that because I’m running out of fuel
Potential won’t keep me warm at night
And at the end of the day it’s fight or flight
I’ve spent too long running from my emotions
I say that I’m ready but I lack the devotion
I wasn’t what they wanted and I’m not surprised
But I’m worth more than just a consolation prize

Lost At Sea

May 29th, 2011

The look in your eyes
Became my demise
I get carried away
I can’t hear what they say
The feelings still there
The butterflies everywhere
I’m melting inside
From you, I can’t hide
I don’t know if it’s real
I don’t know how you feel
This isn’t me
I’m lost at sea
This lifeguard can’t save me
I think I’m going crazy
They have my devotion
But I’m drowning in your ocean