Special Nobody

July 9th, 2006

I’m a tangled mess
When it comes to me and you
And with all my worthless feelings
There’s nothing left to do
With a face full of tears
I fall to the floor
And with my screaming and yelling
I want nothing more
I always feel like
I’m invisible to everybody
This whole time
I’ve been waiting for a special nobody
Someone to help me
Escape my destiny
Someone who will save me
From this insanity
For the longest time
I’ve never believed in fate
I’d change my past
But it’s way too late
Sometimes I wish
I’d never met you at all
Sometimes I feel
Like I’m some stupid Doll
And I can’t help
But still feel the way I do
Even though nothing will ever happen
Between me and you
Happily ever after
Is all nothing but lies
Because after the ending
Is when the happiness dies
Without knowing it
I’ve always been waiting for you
Without showing it
I think about all the things you do
Without wanting it
These feelings take over me
And all that’s left over
Is our reality

2006 (4)

Truth

April 18th, 2018

I don’t know where I stand
I feel so confused
I know I’ve said this before
But I’ve never felt so used
Everyone got what they wanted
They’ve taken everything from me
I don’t know how I feel
I think I’ve been left empty
I gave up pieces of myself
That I didn’t know exist
And from a small group of friends
Another was removed from my list
Did I do this to myself
Have I ruined it all
Am I cutting out more people
The further I step away from Doll
I have a lot to consider
Does it have to be this way
That there’s no one to trust
And this is the price I pay

Toys

August 23rd, 2017

I don’t know what to say
Have I written it all
Everyone has that phase
Where they’re done playing with Dolls
I don’t know where I’m going
I took a wrong turn
I played with the directions
And wound up getting burned
This was only a game
Why does it feel so real
I’ve looked everywhere
And there’s no potion to be healed