Cry

Crazy

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November 8th, 2009

It’s crazy
how people you think you know
turn into
people you don’t.

Eyes wide
there’s so much you can’t see
though it is all real
but it doesn’t exist
because it was fake.

Loud noises
nothing that you want to hear
echo
ear to ear
make it stop
it’s not real
it’s fake
I don’t know these people.

I shake
and I can’t stop
but you can’t see it
because it’s not real
but it’s not fake
I feel it
I feel you
it’s crazy
I don’t know you.

I want to scream
but once I start
I fear
I’ll forget how to stop.

Quitting
don’t be a quitter
scream
and don’t stop.

I cry
and not the kind for pain
the kind
where you lose your mind.

I breathe
but not naturally
I force in the air
but it finds a way out
before reaching my lungs.

Inhale nothing
sink into myself
I can’t escape
you can’t escape
because you’re fighting
yourself.

I thought I knew
myself
you
the mirror
but I don’t.

I found a way
to comfort me
but inside
nothing’s what it is
you can’t see
what I can see.

I’m sinking
into myself
and it’s crazy;

But
I
don’t
know
you.

2009 (24)

So Confused

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October 11th, 2009

So suddenly
I can’t believe
I let myself get into this

And anxiously
I made believe
Happy endings really exist

And on my own
And so alone
I found comfort in a voice

And in the sound
So interwound
I led myself into a choice

And questioning
What once believed
A path I’d find would do me right

And nervously
I can’t believe
I once was looking for the light

And in the end
It will make sense
But nothing seems to anymore

And up and down
This stupid road
Still looking for an open door

I once believed
I once thought true
That love was a mutual feeling

But years of pain
And weekly crying
My broken heart’s finally done healing

And late at night
I couldn’t sleep
With thoughts of you clouding my mind

I took the pain
I took the confusion
Cause loving you just made me blind

And out of sight
Was never out of mind
Until I found someone thought to be better

But I got caught up
I tripped too fast
To find myself under the weather

And friends can’t see
When they’re not around
And maybe I found
I like it that way

And so confused
And so confused
And so confused
And so confused

I can’t say it enough
To bring out it’s worth
Because so confused
Is all I’m worth

Waiting For The Rain

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September 13th, 2009

You say I don’t know you
But I’m sure I know you better
You’re staying in alone
Just to be under the weather
Pushing me away
But I know just who you are
You could take a step past me
But you’re taking this too far

[Chorus:]
Waiting for the rain
Cause you know it’s on its way
Just lock away the pain
There could be a better day
And all you want to do
Is sit around and cry
Stop waiting for the rain
If you want to stay dry

I know that something’s wrong
It shines clearly in your eyes
But your smile never fades
Even when it’s all a lie
Looking at you
Fills my heart in pain
Because I lost you
When you stepped into the rain

[Chorus:]
Waiting for the rain
Cause you know it’s on its way
Just lock away the pain
There could be a better day
And all you want to do
Is sit around and cry
Stop waiting for the rain
If you want to stay dry

Hear the thunder
Feel the lightning
Deep inside
This storms so frightening
And I acknowledge you’re brave
Acknowledge that you’re strong
But deep inside
This solution is so wrong

[Chorus:]
Waiting for the rain
Cause you know it’s on its way
Just lock away the pain
There could be a better day
And all you want to do
Is sit around and cry
Stop waiting for the rain
If you want to stay dry

2009 (25)