September 8th, 2009

I find I can’t believe in much
no matter how hard I try
my dream catcher scarcely catches my bad dreams
my horoscope is never right
and my heart always takes me the wrong way.

I’m caught on this one thing:
fate, does everything happen for a reason?

I know I wouldn’t be who I am
if it weren’t for what’s happened
but was it supposed to happen is what I ponder?

Religion is mostly complicated
I can’t devote myself to something I could never fully understand
and will never ever understand
and I find myself wondering between true or false
fact or fiction
with proof, I could believe
but I just can’t.

Fairy tales have obvious reasons
tied right into love
it’s like a myth
and you can’t find what you’re asking for
and there is no such thing as a happy ending
because I believe nothing ever fully ends.

I still find it hard to believe in truth
and to believe I understand myself
because most of the time it’s all lies.

I find it hard to believe in other people
and to believe in good intentions
but I am always changing.

Right now I don’t know exactly who I am
and I don’t know what to believe
but I have time to figure it out
and I just need someone to have patience with me
so I can finally believe.