My Angel

January 11th, 2025

One year since you’ve been gone
I was trying to plan a visit
Not seeing you one more time
Is something I will always regret
One and a half years
I knew that you were dying
And I said that I don’t
But you had me crying
When I found out
And the day that you died
Two of the last times
That I really cried
11/10 and 1/11
I see the ones in the days
You taught me angel numbers
And I know you’re looking my way
Keeping an eye on me
An angel in the sky
But no matter how much time spent
It was not enough before goodbye

Inside The Shell

January 10th, 2025

Trust is something
I don’t know how to give
Because I moved on
But I still can’t forgive
The person who should’ve been there
Left me alone and broken
Pushed me into a shell of myself
Until I was no longer outspoken
Crippled me into a “tolerable” version
Where I was living a lie
And after all of these years
I still find it hard to cry
I should have been happy
Because I was married
But they left me with these feelings
That I can’t keep buried
How can I trust someone new
When my spouse broke my hope
I longed for a connection
They didn’t want to know
When I needed them most
They were not there
I reached out for help
And they didn’t even care
I was over being neglected
I was their last priority
Now how am I supposed to trust
That anyone can show up for me
After three years I’m still healing
Because I carry this burden
From the decade that I spent
Trying to love an Urban